Age Gap Relationships

Know and Understand Differences …

Many older men and younger women enter into relationships in the hopes that they will be compatible. Some approach dating relationships like they try on new clothes. “Let me see what it would be like to date this older/younger person.” Depending on a couple’s attitude going into the relationship about dating an older or younger person, may positively or negatively impact their future experience with one another.

There is a world the younger generation lives that doesn’t always compliment the older and vice versa. Couples can become easily distracted with the following: gadgets, friends, personal goals, employment, ex-partners, and children from a previous relationship, and more that there is no room in their lives for any serious commitments at this time. They can be careless about what they say and do when in the presence of others, temperamental, rude, and negative when things don’t go their way. A mature person who has forgotten what it was like to be young and struggling with finding self and achieving goals can become insensitive, controlling, jealous or all three while dating a young individual.

When one takes a moment to pause from having sex in a relationship and chooses to really get to know a lover, he or she will find that it is only a matter of time that age gap differences will arise.

Technology disputes
Some older people just aren’t savvy when it comes to technology while some young people are obsessed with it. The generation gap can be a major factor when it comes to relating to one another via technology and can also cause disagreements when boundaries aren’t established.
There just aren’t any rules established between many younger people when it comes to technology. The sky is the limit. If you are older, you just might find technology a bit overwhelming, confusing and unimportant nowadays. However, there are those young people that can’t live without their gadgets. They need them for surfing the Internet, communicating with loved ones, keeping track with daily activities, banking, blogging, etc. When you view videos on various websites, you will find that just about anything deemed funny, crazy, foolish, or offensive is posted up for family and friends to comment on.

Once you enter into a relationship with someone younger or older, you will want to have “the talk” about what is considered off limits to record, post, and who may not be considered a “friend” especially if there is a history of sexual activity. If your reputation is important to you, you might consider drafting up a contract for your date to sign promising to keep your relationship confidential. This contract will protect you in the event that someone you are dating decides to carelessly post what you say and do online. Search the Internet for examples of personal privacy contracts.

Never assume a lover of technology will put your wishes above their own; therefore use caution when talking to him or her and sharing on or offline information. If uncomfortable discussions are ignored, the probability of arguing about a social networking site, text messages, email, live chat, and more might pose a problem later. Many couples break up over disagreements about the disrespect that comes with using gadgets that can be set to private, password protected, and discreetly hidden.

Personality differences
Growing up during a time when social classes, genders, ethnicities, and more have many challenges can affect one’s view about life in general. When this happens, you might find yourself defending, offending, or giving a partner the silent treatment because you lack understanding about the generation he or she has grown up in. You may not have experienced any personal issues that would make you want to scream about anyone or anything, but some people have, so when the tough topics come up, the inexperienced person might want to listen, rather than act judgmental. However, arguments increase when neither party refuses to empathize.

People express their views in different ways. Some are more passionate and talkative about their view, while others, not so much. The age difference becomes a factor when one expects the other to be wise about certain matters, yet he or she is saying or doing things that make him or her appear unwise. Know your partner’s personality. Sometimes mature people can be forgetful, irritable, impatient, and stubborn, these issues come with the aging process. A person can dress and talk youthful, but these visual upgrades don’t keep the clock from ticking. A young person who isn’t use to being around older individuals will have a hard time being compassionate when it comes to one’s age difference especially if he or she is only in the relationship for selfish gain. When one’s shallow objective for being with another is finally realized, it is then that the relationship falls apart.

This can be a major cause of relationship breakdown because one may not be interested in sexual activity while the other is. A partner might not find his or her partner attractive to view, but will settle for a time because of other things occurring in the relationship such as: companionship, travel, and gifts. Sometimes a date may not be interested in having sex exclusively which can be a cause for concern by a lover. The threat of diseases, feelings of rejection, concern that he or she might find someone younger, and breakup can be constant worries.

When one has more money than the other, it can be an issue. In time, one will grow weary of sharing money. The lover might become easily angered and act threatening when he or she is doing something that he or she doesn’t really want to do anymore. Rather than say, “I don’t want to buy anymore gifts or help financially…” he or she loses his or her cool and in time the relationship becomes increasingly challenging to be in.

Although many May-December couples talk about “how great, wonderful it is dating a younger woman…older man,” the reality is that those age differences can and will take a toll on the relationship if you have no real desire to maintain a relationship with someone years older or younger than yourself.

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